We The People

1.28.2017

Facts are important.

The truth is important.

I’m so over this horse shit.

Regardless of your political stance, religious beliefs, sexuality, gender, ethnicity, or anything else that you identify as, you must concede that your “identity” takes a back seat to the truth. Period.

With this new president, the rise of fake news, and the muddying of seemingly everyone’s grasp on reality, I am constantly disheartened by how many people appear to disregard the importance of the truth.

If I see someone post some horseshit on Facebook, I will do the cunty thing I always do, and show the error of their ways. For instance, if someone posts a fake news article, I will pause my whole day, get as much “evidence” as I can, explain why, how, and what is wrong about it. This should be welcomed! What boggles my mind is that most people don’t seem to give a shit. They would rather preserve their belief, though it’s factually wrong. When confronted with a truth, some people will say “that’s your opinion!”

No Mother Fucker, that’s the truth!

I’m sorry the truth doesn’t align with your team every time, but it’s still the truth.
I’m really trying to keep my contempt for bad ideas in check, but my blood boils when someone chooses ignorance to preserve a provably wrong tribal belief when confronted with reality.

Truth should transcend your fucking tribe. And more and more, it doesn’t.
This is frightening.

We the people, need to grow the fuck up.

It’s not about you, your feelings, or your ridiculous team. It’s about facts.

The Right needs to stop acting like Trump is, in any way, a decent or moral person. The guy goes against every American value you supposedly believe in. Stop doing that thing where you just pretend he’s a good guy and admit he’s a fucking prick. He manipulated the shit out of you!

If your friend was doing any of the shit he does, you would be embarrassed to be in public with them. Hold him accountable. Don’t just argue with the Left because they’re on the opposite team, hold that Orange Cunt accountable. Call him out. Make him

better. He’s fucking lying to you and he has been! Get angry. Your ability to sidestep facts and claim it as another’s opinion is a perversion of reality.

Also, you don’t own “American Values”. You’re not any more American than the Left is, I am, or any American citizen who happens to be of a different belief system than you. Your religion is just as fucking stupid as Islam is, just as Scientology is, and so on and so on. Christianity shouldn’t be the deciding factor in making laws on anything. Especially on women’s health! (Mike Pence, you fucking dog-shit human being!)

I’m so confused by you guys. You claim these beliefs based on faith, yet none of the laws you make, tax systems you set up, healthcare, or even the way you govern go with that of the teachings you hold dearly. Your compartmentalization of Separation of Church and State is astonishing. I’ve never read that part where Jesus made the rich richer, while denying health care to the poor? Just because you dislike the ideals the other side has, doesn’t mean you should push aside your own morality, and it definitely doesn’t mean you should make laws barring truth.
I watched so many of you flip at the last minute to preserve the “team attitude”.
This is fucking disgusting.

Find a back bone.

The Left needs to stop acting like free speech is a bad thing and that encouraging people to have their own goofy fucking beliefs -with zero basis in reality- is at all a good idea. Bad ideas should never be free from criticism. Being professionally offended, and making everyone a victim is detrimental to stomping out stupidity.

Like the Right, I’m so confused by the Left. You guys have a feeling of moral superiority, yet you’re filled with contradictions that you never acknowledge. I have so many examples I could choose from, but I’ll stick with religion because I want to make another point later.

I’ll talk shit about Islam as much as I want, just as I will Christianity. They’re the same brand of ridiculous! I get that the other side implements a disgusting level of Islamophobia mixed with racism, but are you seriously going to give an entire religion a “pass”? It’s an oppressive belief system and should be openly criticized without fear of retaliation from the language police. If someone is being an asshole, call them an asshole. That’s how we get better.

Also: If your friends start spouting hippie bullshit about energy crystals, astrology, being witches or any other nonsensical beliefs, please call them out on it. If you believe in ridiculous magical powers outside of a major religion, I have no fucking patience for you. I can hardly stand the fact that the major religions teach children at such young impressionable ages to believe in the mainstream nonsense, but that at least explains the devotion -It’s brainwashing 101.

But a consenting adult going against all reason, logic, and science by choosing to believe in this laughable horse shit makes my brain hurt. I get that it’s probably fun, that’s what fantasy is, but it’s also the epitome of chosen ignorance when truly believed in. Do you believe in Santa Claus and Dragons too?

Stop being ridiculous.

OK, have I successfully pissed everyone off? Are you all offended? No?

The OA was dumb as shit, Orange is the New Black is overrated, I piss in women’s bathrooms when the men’s is taken, I didn’t vote for Hilary, Donald Trump is a pussy, I think you should have to apply to have a child, I use the word “retarded”, Elon Musk is better than (insert your religious figure head), I hate your favorite band and your mom smells like feet.

Yeah, that should do it.

I feel better now that I got that out. But seriously, I am hopeful for a resurgence in placing truth and logic above personal beliefs.
There’s too much goofy shit to ignore these days.
We will grow.

Love,

Matthew Offends

Fuck The DEA

8.11.2016

(Note: I will be referring to the DEA as “those Fucking Fucks” or “Fuck Heads” for the remainder of this entry. I’m sorry for the excessive use of gratuitous language, Mom.)

Jesus Christ.

I woke up this morning to see that those Fuck Heads refused to reschedule Marijuana. As it is now, Marijuana is classified as a Schedule I drug.

If you don’t immediately know why this angers me, let me put it bluntly (zing!): The Fuck Heads think that Heroin and Marijuana are equally harmful to society.

It’s 2016 and the average person who has access to the Internet will undoubtedly know that this is absolute horseshit.

To me, this is an example of corruption and is the poster child for incompetence by certain government agencies.
This angers me so much that I’m almost at a loss for words.

Almost.

Now, I understand that the entire scheduling system is fucking ridiculous. For example, other drugs listed as Schedule I could be arguable as well (LSD and MDMA have shown potential medicinal benefits but haven’t been made available for research because of said classification), but I’m going to focus on Marijuana here.

From the Department of Fuck Heads’ website:
“Schedule I drugs, substances, or chemicals are defined as drugs with no currently accepted medical use and a high potential for abuse. Schedule I drugs are the most dangers drugs of all the drug schedules with potentially severe psychological or physical dependence.”

SHUT THE FUCK UP.

“...no currently accepted medical use...”

Tell that to the people who find life exponentially better while managing pain sans your (prescribed) schedule II drugs that were fucking up their lives.
Tell that to the fucking poster children with the rare forms of epilepsy who benefit GREATLY from cannabis.

Tell that to anyone who has benefited greatly from cannabis use, myself included.

You Fucking Fucks. The only reason there is hardly any medical research on cannabis is because of your Goddamn ban on researching it for the last 50 fucking years.**

“...the most dangerous drugs of all the drug schedules...”

Ok.
Jesus.
My blood is boiling.
Let me take a moment to compose myself so I can do this one with out cursing.

This is just not true at all. Everyone knows this. Prove that statement. Now. Because guess what, ALL THE FUCKING EVIDENCE POINTS TO THE EXACT FUCKING OPPOSITE... YOU FUCKING FUCKS!

Whoops.

We can all agree that something smells awfully like shit in this situation. Quick, everyone check your shoes.
Anything?
No?

Fuck Heads?
OH, YOU ASSHOLE! Why would you not scrape off all that shit before coming in here and acting like everything is normal?

Who’s shit is it you ask?
Ugh.
Ok, who knows what a lobbyist is?
But I hope most people know what a lobbyist is. Though, assuming most people know these basic things has burned me a lot before.
(See: This election.)
It seems like a lot of people enjoy their ignorance. It makes me feel like a paranoid lunatic for knowing anything about how government works.
(I know very little.)

So,
Lobbyist:
noun
1. A person who tries to influence legislation on behalf of a special interest; a member of a lobby.
-Dictionary.com

Sounds a little sketchy, right?

Lobbyists aren’t inherently bad. They justify doing what they do in order to help their interests. That’s how groups like teachers unions and non-profits are able to be heard by the ones writing the laws. They represent groups to make change happen. Lobbyists make the case (or deals) to implement changes that affect how our country is run. They are a MASSIVE part of the current system.

The problem? They are for hire negotiators.
They make deals with the power structure. Having pull in that system is a commodity. Who has the most interest in owning the best lobbyists? The giant corporations and groups who need to look out for their interests. People who stand to gain or lose the most from any law, will hire the best lobbyists.
Well, that’s not bad, right? Again, not inherently bad... BUT THEY FUCKING LOOK OUT FOR THEIR INTERESTS AND REALLY DON’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ANYTHING ELSE.
So if your interest is money, and you stand to lose money by a new law... you lobby against that law, regardless of the data or what the people want.

So who’s lobbying to keep the federal ban on Marijuana? People or groups genuinely concerned with the public health? HAHAHAHAHA Not even remotely close.

-Police unions (A huge part of the criminal justice system’s revenue is policing marijuana use)
-Private Prison Corporations (They make a lot of money housing convicted users)
-Prison Guard Unions (If the prisons don’t have money from the lack of inmates, they will lose their jobs.)
-Pharmaceutical Corporations (They are scared of losing business form all those “Non medicinal” properties)
-Alcohol and Beer companies (When recreational use in Colorado went up, alcohol related crimes dropped significantly, leading people to believe that use went down. I’m not sure on the sales, but I would wager they dropped.)

I’m not a conspiracy theorist, and I despise when people downplay facts or truths by assuming they are “conspiracy theories” simply because they haven’t looked into it. Just because something sounds so fucking dark and unbelievable doesn’t mean it’s not true.

It is true.
It is unbelievable.
It is fucking dark.
And we should all be screaming about how ludicrous this all is.

Fuck you, you Fucking Fucks.

-Matthew Curses

Here I am enjoying a Schedule I drug.

**I know the ban was recently lifted. It was a brutal effort to get that done, and it wasn’t lifted because the Fuck Heads wanted to research it. It was lifted because the people demanded it. Good job, people.