We The People

1.28.2017

Facts are important.

The truth is important.

I’m so over this horse shit.

Regardless of your political stance, religious beliefs, sexuality, gender, ethnicity, or anything else that you identify as, you must concede that your “identity” takes a back seat to the truth. Period.

With this new president, the rise of fake news, and the muddying of seemingly everyone’s grasp on reality, I am constantly disheartened by how many people appear to disregard the importance of the truth.

If I see someone post some horseshit on Facebook, I will do the cunty thing I always do, and show the error of their ways. For instance, if someone posts a fake news article, I will pause my whole day, get as much “evidence” as I can, explain why, how, and what is wrong about it. This should be welcomed! What boggles my mind is that most people don’t seem to give a shit. They would rather preserve their belief, though it’s factually wrong. When confronted with a truth, some people will say “that’s your opinion!”

No Mother Fucker, that’s the truth!

I’m sorry the truth doesn’t align with your team every time, but it’s still the truth.
I’m really trying to keep my contempt for bad ideas in check, but my blood boils when someone chooses ignorance to preserve a provably wrong tribal belief when confronted with reality.

Truth should transcend your fucking tribe. And more and more, it doesn’t.
This is frightening.

We the people, need to grow the fuck up.

It’s not about you, your feelings, or your ridiculous team. It’s about facts.

The Right needs to stop acting like Trump is, in any way, a decent or moral person. The guy goes against every American value you supposedly believe in. Stop doing that thing where you just pretend he’s a good guy and admit he’s a fucking prick. He manipulated the shit out of you!

If your friend was doing any of the shit he does, you would be embarrassed to be in public with them. Hold him accountable. Don’t just argue with the Left because they’re on the opposite team, hold that Orange Cunt accountable. Call him out. Make him

better. He’s fucking lying to you and he has been! Get angry. Your ability to sidestep facts and claim it as another’s opinion is a perversion of reality.

Also, you don’t own “American Values”. You’re not any more American than the Left is, I am, or any American citizen who happens to be of a different belief system than you. Your religion is just as fucking stupid as Islam is, just as Scientology is, and so on and so on. Christianity shouldn’t be the deciding factor in making laws on anything. Especially on women’s health! (Mike Pence, you fucking dog-shit human being!)

I’m so confused by you guys. You claim these beliefs based on faith, yet none of the laws you make, tax systems you set up, healthcare, or even the way you govern go with that of the teachings you hold dearly. Your compartmentalization of Separation of Church and State is astonishing. I’ve never read that part where Jesus made the rich richer, while denying health care to the poor? Just because you dislike the ideals the other side has, doesn’t mean you should push aside your own morality, and it definitely doesn’t mean you should make laws barring truth.
I watched so many of you flip at the last minute to preserve the “team attitude”.
This is fucking disgusting.

Find a back bone.

The Left needs to stop acting like free speech is a bad thing and that encouraging people to have their own goofy fucking beliefs -with zero basis in reality- is at all a good idea. Bad ideas should never be free from criticism. Being professionally offended, and making everyone a victim is detrimental to stomping out stupidity.

Like the Right, I’m so confused by the Left. You guys have a feeling of moral superiority, yet you’re filled with contradictions that you never acknowledge. I have so many examples I could choose from, but I’ll stick with religion because I want to make another point later.

I’ll talk shit about Islam as much as I want, just as I will Christianity. They’re the same brand of ridiculous! I get that the other side implements a disgusting level of Islamophobia mixed with racism, but are you seriously going to give an entire religion a “pass”? It’s an oppressive belief system and should be openly criticized without fear of retaliation from the language police. If someone is being an asshole, call them an asshole. That’s how we get better.

Also: If your friends start spouting hippie bullshit about energy crystals, astrology, being witches or any other nonsensical beliefs, please call them out on it. If you believe in ridiculous magical powers outside of a major religion, I have no fucking patience for you. I can hardly stand the fact that the major religions teach children at such young impressionable ages to believe in the mainstream nonsense, but that at least explains the devotion -It’s brainwashing 101.

But a consenting adult going against all reason, logic, and science by choosing to believe in this laughable horse shit makes my brain hurt. I get that it’s probably fun, that’s what fantasy is, but it’s also the epitome of chosen ignorance when truly believed in. Do you believe in Santa Claus and Dragons too?

Stop being ridiculous.

OK, have I successfully pissed everyone off? Are you all offended? No?

The OA was dumb as shit, Orange is the New Black is overrated, I piss in women’s bathrooms when the men’s is taken, I didn’t vote for Hilary, Donald Trump is a pussy, I think you should have to apply to have a child, I use the word “retarded”, Elon Musk is better than (insert your religious figure head), I hate your favorite band and your mom smells like feet.

Yeah, that should do it.

I feel better now that I got that out. But seriously, I am hopeful for a resurgence in placing truth and logic above personal beliefs.
There’s too much goofy shit to ignore these days.
We will grow.

Love,

Matthew Offends

Your Beliefs Are Not Above Criticism

8.4.2016

I’m going to try my best here to not piss off anyone.

The other day I found myself having a rare night of nothing to do. I had a shoot planned, but since it’s LA and people here are flaky as shit, it was cancelled last minute. I was a little upset so I figured I’d go for a walk to clear my head.
I ended up at a trendy bar about a mile away from my apartment. I was in a grumpy mood (surprise!), but I wanted to go talk to people and shake off whatever funk I was in.

After about 30 minutes of me drinking water at the bar (party), a small group of very good-looking hipsters walked in. The place was fairly empty and they struck up conversation. There was this adorable little teeny tiny short girl (is that condescending?) who kept trying to talk to me one-on-one at awkward times. The group would be talking about one topic and then she would turn to me and ask me a completely unrelated question at very strange moments. Like, that moment right after I would say something to one person and right before they started to respond. She informed me she had some social issues, which I usually think is bullshit, but this seemed to explain a lot of things.

The questions weren’t bad or anything, in fact quite good... just poorly timed. After hearing a few of my responses to questions about psychedelics and things about meditation, her eyes started to light up. She seemed to be into whatever I was saying, hanging on to every word. I have to admit, I like when other people like hearing me talk. I’m kind of an asshole like that.

(See: This blog)

She asked me for my phone number, which was peculiarly timed as well. Plus, I don’t like giving my number out to strangers. I’m also the worst person in the world at saying “No.” So, I let her enter her number and call herself from my phone. Whatever.

Almost immediately after, she asked me about energy sources or crystals or whatever the current LA hippie bullshit is currently trending. I checked out. Immediately. I kept thinking, “Ah, fuck, what have I gotten myself into?” I tried to pretend to be interested, but it was like the air left the room. I just don’t give a shit. She could sense it. Everyone could sense it.

Sensing my lack of interest must have made her feel like she had to convince me it was all real... right then and there. In My adult life, no one’s ever done that before. Usually after I say out loud, “I don’t believe in that kind of stuff”, they just let it go. She informed me that it’s real, she’s a shaman, and there was a simple form of energy ball that she could show me right there to prove that it is in fact real.

Fuck.

I entertained her and let her show me -Mostly because I didn’t know what to do. It seemed too awkward to say no.

She had me hold my hands in front of my chest, palms facing each other, and slowly start pulling them apart and back together. Imagine me pushing together an invisible Nerf ball and then gently letting it return to it’s natural shape. After about thirty seconds she said, “Do you feel the heat on your finger tips?”

I fucking panicked.

No, of course I don’t feel the imaginary heat.
If this were in any way remotely real, one could measure the heat source easily with the simplest of tests.
I just started thinking about how I could prove this to be bullshit.
You could put a common thermometer on my fingertips before I started playing with fake Nerf ball, and then right after and measure that goddamn difference.

“I don’t think so?” I said. I’m a coward.

She seemed let down. Like her ancient shamanic powers had failed her. We tried again with the same results. I finally said, “Listen, I don’t believe in any of this stuff so maybe it just doesn’t work on me.” She explained that it should and that if I try more it will work.

In the name of science, I wasn’t going to let this go on any longer. I let her know that I truly don’t believe in this stuff and I was going to pass on trying it again. She asked what I believe in and I responded honestly:
“Mostly things that can be scientifically proven.”

(Awkward pause)

“I mean, there are probably loads of things science hasn’t discovered that we are unable to understand or sense, but until we can justly understand it, I just choose to stick with the known.”
This upset her.

She had this look of disappointment on her face that was as if I just pulled my pants down and shit on her shamanic cloak.

(BTW, She wasn’t wearing a cloak, but if she didn’t have one at home then SHE’S NOT A FUCKING SHAMAN!)

She started arguing with me about her beliefs and going on about how science can’t explain everything, and that her things are real. It was eerily reminiscent of when my very berry religious extended family was failing to understand how I could just not believe in the Christian god. I remember being looked at as if I was a fucking idiot for choosing to not believe. It was beyond their comprehension.

She promised the world would be better if everyone realized their true power. I agreed.

When I wasn’t convinced of her beliefs, she became upset. After she specifically asked what I believed in and I answered, she became upset. When pressured to explain why, and I responded with a healthy dose of skepticism and criticism, she became upset. (Do you see a pattern here?) I wasn’t poking fun of her; I was showing the holes I had poked within my head. I do this often. And not just with these trendy LA hipster shamans, with every major religion as well.

People get really really upset when other people don’t believe what they believe.

We all have different ways of deciding what the truth is. Some of us look for truth in reality and tangible facts; others search for it in love and energy. Most people (in America) look for the truth in old books written by flawed people.

My point is: It doesn’t matter.

Whatever turns you on, that’s OK.
But don’t force those beliefs on anyone else. Don’t get offended when someone pokes holes in your belief system, especially if they are doing it without malicious intentions. Don’t become angry when they don’t believe in your “miracles”. And if you ask someone a question and they answer honestly, don’t get offended. You walked into that.

One last thing:

A person believing in other things doesn’t have to fuck your day up so much. Just chill. Have a sense of humor. Realize life is short, and it’s not a big deal that we don't all share the same paranoia of death. And if someone criticizes your faith, try and keep in mind that they are just another person with whom you have way more in common with than you may think.

Be kind.

Love,

Matthew Burns (in Hell)